Emily Timbol

The Calm Before the Storm of…Happiness?

May
07

It is rare I find something so devilishly delightful, that it causes me to cackle manically, throw my head back in glee, and clap my hands like a James Bond villain. Last week, while sitting at my computer, I realized I could officially delete my entire “Wedding” board on Pinterest –  the cackling followed.

The wedding is over! More importantly, I’m married! Also, (almost) equally exciting, I can stop thinking and talking about weddings now and have my brain back! Maniacal laugh, maniacal laugh, maniacal laugh.
Ryan and I’s wedding was fun, incredibly special, unique, and absolutely nothing like we wanted it to be. I debated with turning this post into a description of our wedding day, and how everything that went wrong (there was a LOT) only helped to make it more “us”, but decided to possibly write that as an essay instead. To sum it up, it rained, and rained, and rained, and so the romantic and intimate outdoor courtyard wedding we planned turned into a larger, modern indoor wedding inside the atrium of the library. We started things 45 min late, half of our decorations went unused due to confusion and there was thunder and lightning while we said our vows. And it was wonderful. Truly, completely wonderful. The good news is, most people had no idea (until now) how many things actually went “wrong”, and since the food was delicious and no one got wet, it appears a good time was had by all.
Now…..we’re married. And we’re making waffles, and buying furniture, and spending hours trying to figure out just how Swedish people with apparently tiny double jointed hands put together said furniture, and when we finish that, spending time learning how to combine our lives. I’m no pro at this or anything, but so far marriage is looking like the best decision I ever made. Mostly, because it’s teaching me how to be a part of a team.
When I was in high school and decided I wanted to do something athletic that would look good on my college applications, I picked tennis, the one thing that didn’t involve me having to play as part of a team. I have people issues (also, it was the only thing I actually had any skill in, but that’s not the point I’m trying to make.) 
I loved that when I played matches, it was just me, and my opponent on the court. I didn’t have to worry about anyone else depending on me, or having to carry a weaker teammate, or working together with anyone. I made all the moves, decisions, and more frequently than not, mistakes (until they added me to the doubles team, but let’s pretend that didn’t happen.)
I never played on a sports team like soccer, or softball, or anything that needed communication for success, so I didn’t realize how much more work, but at the same time, how much more rewarding, is a win resulting from teamwork. Now that I’m married, that whole “me against the world” mentality is gone, because for the rest of my life, I’m part of a team. While that’s undeniably going to make my life more complicated, it’s incredible knowing I never have to face any challenge or adversity alone. I have a teammate. What my stupid immature high school brain didn’t realize while choosing tennis over a team sport, was that sometimes, the difference between winning or losing is whether or not you have someone to help you when you need it most. My concern was in having to “carry” someone else, not realizing there’d be times where I’d need to be carried too.
Apparently, even though it’s only been 16 days, marriage really has changed me.
I just used a sports metaphor in my blog. 

One Response to The Calm Before the Storm of…Happiness?

  1. Hey, Paul used sports metaphors, too 😉

    Thanks for this, Emily. Besides, being a great read, it’s a good reminder for those of us who are long-married that my wife and I are a team. I always need to hear that.

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