Emily Timbol

Fiction Author. Good at making stuff up.

I Think I’ll Miss The Copier Most


Today is my last day at my current job.

I always thought that I would utter those words through a ski mask while holding a match and can of gasoline, but no, I’m still felony free. After two years, six months, and thirteen days (and yes that’s the actual number, I googled it) I am free.

928 days have elapsed since I first started working here, but I could guarantee you my boss knows less about me than you do. I fully understand that there needs to be barriers that exist between a professional and personal relationship (just ask Demi Moore and Michael Douglas about that) but a little bit of interest in your employees lives can go a long way. It matters that employees feel appreciated, and if you are an employer, it honestly is in your best interest to treat them fairly. Science proves that.

Now, it is true that a lot of my unhappiness stems from the fact that I work in an industry that is stereotypically older, conservative, technologically stubborn, and ultra conventional. Let’s just say when I started and they told me their biggest client was Nascar I should have saw what was coming. It should then be no surprise to you that I didn’t exactly fit into a company where, during the election cycle, I was sent home for wearing an “Obama ’08” T-Shirt on casual Friday because HR got so many complaints on it’s “offensiveness.” Incidentally, the next day when I saw three people with “McCain/Palin” coffee mugs I was the only one “offended.” And please, don’t get me started about the comments by the old men in the sexual harassment seminar that usually began with, “Well if they don’t want me to look, they shouldn’t have such big breasts!” Sigh.

Basically though, I have felt much like Will Ferrell in the beginning of Elf, falling behind in his job at producing Etch-a-Sketch’s, deep down knowing that he wasn’t made for that. I wasn’t made to work a job in an industry I hate, for a company that doesn’t care about it’s employees, doing work that gives me no creative outlet. I wasn’t made to do the same thing, every day, over and over, never getting a varying response other than “thanks” no matter how hard or not I worked on it. I also wasn’t made to produce Etch-a-Sketch’s, but I guarantee I would have tried harder at that than I’ve tried at this for the past year.

Now, if you’re thinking I’m an idiot since my new boss surely knows how to use Google, you are right, he does, but he also already knows everything I just said, because I told him in my interview. And while, technically, my title at this new company will be the same title as the one I currently (for 2.5 more hours) have, I am confident it will be different. For one, it’s a completely different industry, two – I already feel appreciated since all six people who interviewed me unanimously wanted to hire me, and three- they told me flat out that no two days look the same, and the work is always changing. Also, during my walk through I was happy to see that I wasn’t the youngest person in the company by about 30 years, and I saw absolutely zero Nascar signs.

While no, my new job does not have anything to do with writing, I am not discouraged in the least. I am fully aware that I just started formally pursuing a career in writing, less than a year ago, and building up a working resume will take time. I will not be disheartened if it takes me five, or even ten years to get together enough material for a book proposal or a full time writing career. I just want to have a job during that time that doesn’t make me miserable, where I can feel appreciated, and put forth an effort level that the company deserves. So if you’re reading this new boss, don’t worry, I won’t be blogging on the clock.

And if you’re reading this old boss, I stole the stapler, and you can’t have it back. It was a red Swingline and it’s MINE.

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